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This section is for our beloved senior citizens who have reached an age that these jokes now have real meaning! We have all achieved the aches and pains, as well as the wisdom, of growing older! Laugh loud and heartyit’s good for you! Just eat till the wrinkles fill out.
Hospital regulations require a wheelchair for patients being discharged. However, while working as a student nurse, I found one elderly gentleman already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet who insisted he didn’t need my help to leave the hospital. After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let me wheel him to the elevator. On the way down I asked him if his wife was meeting him. All The BenifitsA senior citizen said to his eighty-year old buddy: “So I hear you’re getting married? This woman, is she good looking? Naw, she can’t cook too well.
Does she have lots of money? Well, then, is she good in bed? Why in the world do you want to marry her then? Because she can still drive after dark! It’s scary when you start making the same noises as your coffee maker. A little old lady was running up and down the halls in a nursing home. As she walked, she would flip up the hem of her nightgown and say “Supersex.
She walked up to an elderly man in a wheelchair. Flipping her gown at him, she said, “Supersex. He sat silently for a moment or two and finally answered, “I’ll take the soup. I Have Forgotten More Than You Will Ever Lean. A young man was giving an old timer a hard time about not being able to remember anything.
The Old man replied “Sonny boy I have forgotten more than you will ever learn”. The young man said well you cant even remember your own name. The senior citizen nodded and said see that proves my point I have forgotten my name but it is for sure one thing that you will never learn. I got used to arthritis, To my dentures I’m resigned.
I can manage my bifocals, But oh, how much I miss my mind. For sometimes I cannot remember When I stand atop the stairs,If I must go down for something Or if I’ve just come up from there. And before the fridge, so often My mind is filled with nagging doubt. Have I just put food away, or Have I come to take some out. I called a friend not long ago, When they answered I just moaned.